The 2011 MLB Baseball season starts tomorrow and it will be nice to get another World Series ring for the Chicago White Sox. Every year I try to get down to Anaheim at least once to see the White Sox play the Angels and its even better in the rare occasion when they come to L.A. to play the Dodgers. Check out this video from the historic 2005 White Sox Championship season.
I like seeing live events. Sports, Concerts, Pro-wrestling, etc. I usually buy the cheapest ticket possible and then I "sneak up" to a better seat once the game starts. This can usually be done pretty easily when your with your "guy friends", but girlfriends hate it. Sneaking up to a better seat takes a relaxed skill that you have to do with confidence. Girlfriends seem to think its like robbing a bank.
I'll admit, it can be a little nerve racking when you get caught, Like when your sitting in the wrong seat and you see the rightful owner come prancing down the stairs, he stops and finds his row, counts the seats and double checks his ticket. (most people hate confrontation and this can be used to your advantage) You can see them contemplating saying something to you. But eventually they will usually strum up the balls to come over and say "These are our seats"
This is where it gets awkward, when being confronted, you have 2 choices. You can either apologize profusely and swear it was an accident. "What? "These aren't the Lawn seats" "I'm sorry" "I thought they seemed a little close" or you can choose my personal favorite ... to slowly get up and "stare down the family" making them feel like they made a mistake and its their fault for wanting to sit in their expensive seats that they paid for. Make them feel like they are the ones that are wrong. (this never works by the way! I'm not very intimidating, I usually will trip, or spill a drink while doing this) Usually, the rest of the crowd will think your a real idiot and they will turn into an angry mob against you like Frankenstein. You become the leper of the ballpark! But don't worry, you can move, there are usually plenty of other open seats around that are not yours. Nobody would ever think that you would do it twice right? Also, your girlfriend will love dealing with this!
Keep in mind that this will usually also backfire on Airplanes.
See you at the ballpark!
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Sunday, March 20, 2011
March 18th-20th The Weekend of Rock! GNR tribute band, Sammy Hagar & more.
It's no secret that I love 80's hair bands rock n roll. Especially Guns N Roses. I spend most of the day day dreaming about them and have even managed to incorporate them into my extreme OCD. (If I don't look at my GNR albums and Axl picture before I leave the house I will have a bad day). So I was super excited when I noticed that GNR tribute band "Hollywood Rose" was playing at the "Whiskey A Go-Go" on Sunset this past Saturday night.
I started out the night at the Spotlight Comedy club, performing for about 22 people. (5 were Russian) After the show I slipped through Laurel Canyon to meet a friend at the Rainbow Room. Heading west down Sunset is when I saw "The Whiskey's" marquee had "Hollywood Rose" on it. It's Party time!
Since my cheap ass wont pay for parking, I usually park for free on south Doheny almost a good mile away from the Rainbow Room. Its about a 10 minute walk uphill but its worth it to not have to pay 3 bucks at a meter, or worse, 5 bucks to valet. (impressed ladies?)
The Rainbow Room is packed on Saturday nights, and my friend Gary was there waiting. Gary played "Eddie" in the movie "Jaws 2" and he wont let you forget it. Ever. He has "Jaws 2" tourets syndrome, which is hilarious to me, who grew up on that movie, but not so amusing to the waitress's who are slammed and trying to figure out what he means when he orders the "shark pizza", luckily I am there to translate and can make up the difference when he leaves a "70's style" tip. He hasn't accounted for inflation in 30's years.
After dinner it was time to check out some "Hollywood Rose", I walked down to the "Whiskey" and put my left over "Shark Pizza" in the garbage. 10 bucks to get in! I loved it. Money is no option when it comes to hearing some "Guns" tunes. I was amped! (I just noticed that I seem to blog like a teenage girl)
"Hollywood Rose" was a great time, they kicked off the show with some "GNR" tunes that are not known to the "casual fan". ("Right next door to hell" "Back off Bitch") But the crowd got heated up for the classic 3 ("Jungle, "Sweet Child" & "Paradise City") There was one rough and tumble English dude who obviously saw "Green Street Hooligans" too many times and wanted start moshing. Luckily most Americans in the club hated him and ignored his dumb ass. (he was also barefoot, yes, he was a true idiot) I also noticed a girl who was perched upstairs with a perfect view of the show, who chose to spend the whole show "texting". I would have chucked a bottle at her head but I'm a gentleman.
As for the band, "Fake Axl" was awesome, he had the moves down, his voice sounded great, and he even did the usual Axl costume changes. (although he did them on the side of the stage in full view of the audience). His "Axl Pose" gut glistened under the stagelights. But he did it all with confidence, which is a key part of being a stand out performer. "Fake Slash" sounded great, and even had the same leg moves that Slash rocked out in "GNR live in Paris '93". I'll see them again anytime. The show ended and I headed back out into the "November Rain" for my long walk back to my car parked on Doheny. (it's technically "March Rain", but it didn't have the same ring to it)
I had to get to bed, because Sunday I had a date with the "Red Rocker" Sammy Hagar.
Sammy Hagar was doing a book signing at "Book Soup" on Sunset at 5pm. In high school I was a huge Van Halen fan and they are still my 2nd favorite behind GNR. It was pouring rain all weekend in L.A. I caught an early morning show of "Limitless" at the AMC Century City and then spent a good hour in the "Borders" book store that was going out of business. That pisses me off, another book store closing. The continuously changing electronic media world can fuck off. I refuse to switch over to blue-ray until at least 2016. Remember around 2002, when Steve Jobs and the Apple corporation used to bitch about Microsoft being a "monopoly?" And the only time you would ever see an "Apple" computer was when they would be shamelessly promoted in teen horror movies, where a young girl who was about to be the next victim could be seen instant messaging her online friend on her bright orange gaudy IMAC computer with a "see though" CPU. Its now 2011 and they are still the kings of product placement. See the movie "I am Number Four" and you cant go 10 minutes without the lead character checking his I-phone. (Which I'm sure is what the books author originally wrote)
At the AMC theater, when you buy your movie ticket, you pick out your seat ahead of time, which I hate. I never sit in the chair I picked, and its always embarrasing when somebody comes up and awkwardly stands over me saying "Your in my seat." I usually apologize with my mouth, but my eyes tell them to "Fuck off" as I stumble around in the dark trying to find another spot. (this also happens to me at Sporting Events, Concerts, or any other place that requires assigned seating) (again ladies, I'm sure your impressed!)
Anyways, I liked the movie "Limitless" and thought Bradley Cooper did a great job. After the movie and walking around the mall, We headed to "Book Soup" to see Sammy Hager who was signing copies of his new book "RED".
I had read excerpts from Sammy's book in "Rolling Stone" and was immediately hooked. He was dishing alot of dirt on Eddie Van Halen and I couldn't wait to get my paws on it. We pulled up to "Book Soup" and the line wasn't too bad, we were an hour and a half early, but it was pouring rain and freezing cold outside. When 5 o'clock came, the line moved quickly and suddenly our grand moment was about to happen. I spent sometime trying to think of a "clever" question to ask Sammy when I met him to make myself stand out from the crowd. Although I think I already stood out from the pack because most of the people in the line were mutants. You would have thought it was a line for a "Star Trek" convention or a "VD clinic". Where were all the groupies? Maybe they melt in the rain.
Sammy signed my book, commented on my Chicago White Sox hat and slapped me a high five. He seemed like a great guy, but the "Book Soup" employees spend so much time up your ass making the line move along that the whole "meet & greet" experience is over before you know it. But I'm glad he wrote the book and took the time to meet some fans. No matter what your opinion is about who should sing for Van Halen, you cant deny that Sammy Hagar always delivers. It was worth the wait.
I am now sitting on my couch with the usual cast of loons, re-watching the Comedy Central "Roast of Donald Trump" "Give it up for Greg Giraldo" (it was fucking awesome) and "WWE Smackdown". It's been a great weekend!
Please check out the Comedy Central memorial show "Give it up for Greg Giraldo." It was really well done and is a great tribute to the late comedian Greg Giraldo.
I started out the night at the Spotlight Comedy club, performing for about 22 people. (5 were Russian) After the show I slipped through Laurel Canyon to meet a friend at the Rainbow Room. Heading west down Sunset is when I saw "The Whiskey's" marquee had "Hollywood Rose" on it. It's Party time!
Since my cheap ass wont pay for parking, I usually park for free on south Doheny almost a good mile away from the Rainbow Room. Its about a 10 minute walk uphill but its worth it to not have to pay 3 bucks at a meter, or worse, 5 bucks to valet. (impressed ladies?)
The Rainbow Room is packed on Saturday nights, and my friend Gary was there waiting. Gary played "Eddie" in the movie "Jaws 2" and he wont let you forget it. Ever. He has "Jaws 2" tourets syndrome, which is hilarious to me, who grew up on that movie, but not so amusing to the waitress's who are slammed and trying to figure out what he means when he orders the "shark pizza", luckily I am there to translate and can make up the difference when he leaves a "70's style" tip. He hasn't accounted for inflation in 30's years.
After dinner it was time to check out some "Hollywood Rose", I walked down to the "Whiskey" and put my left over "Shark Pizza" in the garbage. 10 bucks to get in! I loved it. Money is no option when it comes to hearing some "Guns" tunes. I was amped! (I just noticed that I seem to blog like a teenage girl)
"Hollywood Rose" was a great time, they kicked off the show with some "GNR" tunes that are not known to the "casual fan". ("Right next door to hell" "Back off Bitch") But the crowd got heated up for the classic 3 ("Jungle, "Sweet Child" & "Paradise City") There was one rough and tumble English dude who obviously saw "Green Street Hooligans" too many times and wanted start moshing. Luckily most Americans in the club hated him and ignored his dumb ass. (he was also barefoot, yes, he was a true idiot) I also noticed a girl who was perched upstairs with a perfect view of the show, who chose to spend the whole show "texting". I would have chucked a bottle at her head but I'm a gentleman.
As for the band, "Fake Axl" was awesome, he had the moves down, his voice sounded great, and he even did the usual Axl costume changes. (although he did them on the side of the stage in full view of the audience). His "Axl Pose" gut glistened under the stagelights. But he did it all with confidence, which is a key part of being a stand out performer. "Fake Slash" sounded great, and even had the same leg moves that Slash rocked out in "GNR live in Paris '93". I'll see them again anytime. The show ended and I headed back out into the "November Rain" for my long walk back to my car parked on Doheny. (it's technically "March Rain", but it didn't have the same ring to it)
I had to get to bed, because Sunday I had a date with the "Red Rocker" Sammy Hagar.
Sammy Hagar was doing a book signing at "Book Soup" on Sunset at 5pm. In high school I was a huge Van Halen fan and they are still my 2nd favorite behind GNR. It was pouring rain all weekend in L.A. I caught an early morning show of "Limitless" at the AMC Century City and then spent a good hour in the "Borders" book store that was going out of business. That pisses me off, another book store closing. The continuously changing electronic media world can fuck off. I refuse to switch over to blue-ray until at least 2016. Remember around 2002, when Steve Jobs and the Apple corporation used to bitch about Microsoft being a "monopoly?" And the only time you would ever see an "Apple" computer was when they would be shamelessly promoted in teen horror movies, where a young girl who was about to be the next victim could be seen instant messaging her online friend on her bright orange gaudy IMAC computer with a "see though" CPU. Its now 2011 and they are still the kings of product placement. See the movie "I am Number Four" and you cant go 10 minutes without the lead character checking his I-phone. (Which I'm sure is what the books author originally wrote)
At the AMC theater, when you buy your movie ticket, you pick out your seat ahead of time, which I hate. I never sit in the chair I picked, and its always embarrasing when somebody comes up and awkwardly stands over me saying "Your in my seat." I usually apologize with my mouth, but my eyes tell them to "Fuck off" as I stumble around in the dark trying to find another spot. (this also happens to me at Sporting Events, Concerts, or any other place that requires assigned seating) (again ladies, I'm sure your impressed!)
Anyways, I liked the movie "Limitless" and thought Bradley Cooper did a great job. After the movie and walking around the mall, We headed to "Book Soup" to see Sammy Hager who was signing copies of his new book "RED".
I had read excerpts from Sammy's book in "Rolling Stone" and was immediately hooked. He was dishing alot of dirt on Eddie Van Halen and I couldn't wait to get my paws on it. We pulled up to "Book Soup" and the line wasn't too bad, we were an hour and a half early, but it was pouring rain and freezing cold outside. When 5 o'clock came, the line moved quickly and suddenly our grand moment was about to happen. I spent sometime trying to think of a "clever" question to ask Sammy when I met him to make myself stand out from the crowd. Although I think I already stood out from the pack because most of the people in the line were mutants. You would have thought it was a line for a "Star Trek" convention or a "VD clinic". Where were all the groupies? Maybe they melt in the rain.
Sammy signed my book, commented on my Chicago White Sox hat and slapped me a high five. He seemed like a great guy, but the "Book Soup" employees spend so much time up your ass making the line move along that the whole "meet & greet" experience is over before you know it. But I'm glad he wrote the book and took the time to meet some fans. No matter what your opinion is about who should sing for Van Halen, you cant deny that Sammy Hagar always delivers. It was worth the wait.
I am now sitting on my couch with the usual cast of loons, re-watching the Comedy Central "Roast of Donald Trump" "Give it up for Greg Giraldo" (it was fucking awesome) and "WWE Smackdown". It's been a great weekend!
Please check out the Comedy Central memorial show "Give it up for Greg Giraldo." It was really well done and is a great tribute to the late comedian Greg Giraldo.
Friday, March 11, 2011
March 11th, 2011 , Comedy Websites, Battle of Tsunami
I like to hang out on the stand up comedy websites, checking up on comedy news, gossip etc. (similiar to a girl hanging out on perezhilton.com, only people dont draw fake jizz on the comics faces, although, it would be funny to see Gallagher with a sperm mustache)
Here are some kick ass comedy websites that are entertaining and helpful to all levels of comics.
www.thecomicscomic.com
www.punchlinemagazine.com
www.sandpapersuit.com
www.aspecialthing.com
www.thecomedynerds.com
www.premisepunchtag.wordpress.com
Write these websites down, that way when I see you in person it can be one less thing I have to talk to you about.
TSUNAMI TIME!
Last night around midnight, I sat at the Denny's near my house, watching my cell phone blow up with texts about the earthquake in Japan, people warning me about an impending Tsunami that was heading towards myself in Santa Monica, and my roommate who was vacationing in Hawaii. (transgender operation, see his blog for updates)
I didn't reply back to a single text. Did I want to be over-dramatic and have people think that I had already drowned in Dennys new "2, 4, 6" menu? (see dennys.com for details)
No, You see I just recently changed my cell phone plan to the cheapest one possible, which means I get about 10 free texts a month. SO DON'T TEXT ME!
I don't care if my car is on fire, it can wait till the next billing cycle.
In related news, the movie "Battle: Los Angeles" comes out today, and I hear its pretty good, hopefully the aliens destruction opens up a few parking spots on Ocean Blvd.
Here are some kick ass comedy websites that are entertaining and helpful to all levels of comics.
www.thecomicscomic.com
www.punchlinemagazine.com
www.sandpapersuit.com
www.aspecialthing.com
www.thecomedynerds.com
www.premisepunchtag.wordpress.com
Write these websites down, that way when I see you in person it can be one less thing I have to talk to you about.
TSUNAMI TIME!
Last night around midnight, I sat at the Denny's near my house, watching my cell phone blow up with texts about the earthquake in Japan, people warning me about an impending Tsunami that was heading towards myself in Santa Monica, and my roommate who was vacationing in Hawaii. (transgender operation, see his blog for updates)
I didn't reply back to a single text. Did I want to be over-dramatic and have people think that I had already drowned in Dennys new "2, 4, 6" menu? (see dennys.com for details)
No, You see I just recently changed my cell phone plan to the cheapest one possible, which means I get about 10 free texts a month. SO DON'T TEXT ME!
I don't care if my car is on fire, it can wait till the next billing cycle.
In related news, the movie "Battle: Los Angeles" comes out today, and I hear its pretty good, hopefully the aliens destruction opens up a few parking spots on Ocean Blvd.
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
March 9th, 2011
So this will be my first official "blog post", and since I am one of those tools that always thought I was too cool to be doing stuff like this I'm going to make the first blog officially short and not entertaining. As of right now, I don't have anything that is really pissing me off, so I have nothing to bitch about. Wrestlemania 27 is coming up in April (wait where are you going?,... dont stop reading!) so I'm excited about that. I got to attend Wrestlemania 26 last year, and it was awesome, but I actually like watching it on tv better. (as long as the people I'm with keep their fricken mouths shut) Which actually makes me think of ......
Why is it whenever the subject of pro-wrestling comes up, people always say stuff like "Ohh I remember that WWF stuff, I used to watch "Roddy Piper, Hulk Hogan and the Ultimate Warrior and that guy Brutus who always cut peoples hair". And I sit there thinking, "Who the hell cares what you used to watch". It's like "Yeah, everyone used to watch it", you either watched it in the "Golden Era", (Hulk Hogan, Roddy Piper, 80's style ) etc or you watched it during the "Attitude Era", (Stone Cold, The Rock, late 90's style), but unless you watched it the whole time, and are CURRENTLY watching it, don't bore me with the stories of your older brother putting you in a "boston crab" in 1986.
Anyways, Wrestlemania is April 3rd, if you want, you can come to my house and watch it. As long as you are quiet and enjoy sitting near people who were in the movie "Jaws 2".
Why is it whenever the subject of pro-wrestling comes up, people always say stuff like "Ohh I remember that WWF stuff, I used to watch "Roddy Piper, Hulk Hogan and the Ultimate Warrior and that guy Brutus who always cut peoples hair". And I sit there thinking, "Who the hell cares what you used to watch". It's like "Yeah, everyone used to watch it", you either watched it in the "Golden Era", (Hulk Hogan, Roddy Piper, 80's style ) etc or you watched it during the "Attitude Era", (Stone Cold, The Rock, late 90's style), but unless you watched it the whole time, and are CURRENTLY watching it, don't bore me with the stories of your older brother putting you in a "boston crab" in 1986.
Anyways, Wrestlemania is April 3rd, if you want, you can come to my house and watch it. As long as you are quiet and enjoy sitting near people who were in the movie "Jaws 2".
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