A Snail Tale

I was walking outside my house doing god knows what, when I noticed a Snail was sitting on top of my gate.

Whenever it gets "Moist" out, it becomes Snail central on my walkway.  I usually crunch like 3 or 4 on the bottom of my slippers when I have to get the mail. (I'm joking ... sort of)
But how the hell did this one get on top of the gate?

I went and grabbed my camera and started taking a few photo's.  This was clearly the highlight of my day.

The Snail actually started to get camera shy and started going into its shell. It must of had no makeup on.  I felt like I was in a Pixar movie playing the big dumb human that comes up and starts messing with the "Snail Hero" that is on a journey to the mailbox or something.

I still can't figure out how the hell he got up on that gate!

Then I noticed another one climbing up the side, these things are going vertical!  So that's how he got up there!  But the gate doesn't go all the way to the ground, so it liked jumped or something.  I better leave this mystery to the scientists.

In closing, I thought this post would be a lot more funnier and interesting than it was. And the moral of the story is that Snails are morons.

Movie Idea: "Black Friday"

They should make a movie about a low level schlub who is forced to work the day after Thanksgiving. His business gets robbed and he ends up saving the day while meeting the girl of his dreams. He declares the day a national holiday where nobody in retail ever has to work again.   And he is black.
Maybe Nick Cannon would do it.

Happy Black Friday!

"I'm just here to return something!"

Welcome to the Jungle ... sung by a Wookie

I don't know where the hell this was filmed. I'm assuming in a galaxy far far away.

*You can totally tell this Wookie was a male cheerleader in college.

Directions to Candlestick park from SFO (San Francisco Airport)

If you are flying into San Francisco for a 49ers game getting to Candlestick park can be a pain in the ass. Especially if you've never been there before. Each home game, there are a fuck ton of people that fly into town and have no clue how to get to the park. There are no signs and the locals don't seem to know either.

Here is the simplest way to get to Candlestick from SFO Airport.

*take the airport shuttle to the Bart Train (Bay Area Rapid Transit)

*take the Bart train towards "Pittsburgh /Bay Point" (this is the North train that heads towards the city) (about 7 bucks)

*get off the Bart at the "Balboa Park" stop.

*go upstairs outside the Bart Station, and take the 75x shuttle Bus to Candlestick.
-on game day, the 75x shuttle will be running before and after the game.
It costs 12 bucks per person. There will be a table set up where you just pay the dude 12 bucks and he gives you a ticket for a round trip ride to Candlestick.

*to get back to SFO after the game just use your ticket to catch the 75x Shuttle Bus (located on the West end of the stadium) back to the Balboa Park BART station which you can take back to the Airport.

BUT WHAT IF I WANT TO GO INTO THE CITY BEFORE THE GAME?
Take the BART north towards "Pittsburgh/Bay Point" and get off at the POWELL stop.  This is the stop that takes you into the heart of downtown.  You can walk around San Francisco and see the sights, but make sure you leave for Candlestick a good hour and a half before game time.  To go back, take the BART Powell Stop south to Balboa Park and then catch the 75x shuttle to the game.

*people will tell you other ways and other busses to get there, but this is the quickest, most convenient way to get there.  

Here is the BART map.

*hopefully this is helpful,  now check out other cool stuff on this same blog!
www.chrisgehrt.com

Red Alert! New Bigfoot video!

We got a red alert Bigfoot sighting!   The state of Utah has been a recent hotspot for Sasquatch sightings and we got another one.  With everyone having a camera on their phone (except me) I think we are sure to see many more videos that will finally prove its existence.

Check out this story.

http://www.grindtv.com/outdoor/blog/39929/hikers+take+flight+when+what+they+thought+was+a+bear+resembles+bigfoot/

*During the holiday break I plan on driving south from Seattle to L.A hitting up all the Bigfoot hotspots.  I'll have a complete report on this blog soon.