Garage Sale

This past weekend we decided to have a Garage Sale at our house. It's always fun to get up at 6am on a Saturday to have people try to barter with you about the price of a broken dvd player.

Old shoes, some weird lamps, It was nothing but crap. But sometimes it's hard to let go of stuff. I got a bit sentimental watching a Mexican guy walk off with my old jeans, knowing that they will soon become a bathing suit.

Invitation only ... for Weirdo's.

I noticed that if you want to sell things, every item has to have a story. I got a guy to buy a leather "Flinstones" movie jacket because I said it once belonged to John Goodman. "Yaba Daba Sucka!"

Sorry ladies, no discounts on the Adult Toys.

Some customer's said they were at the garage sale getting gifts for their friends.
That blew my mind. I hope when they said "friends" they meant somebody they met in AA, cuz you would have to be drunk to want some of this stuff!  "Hey man, after you finish off that Yukon Jack, check out this sweet broken hula hoop I got you!"

A fixture at every garage sale, "Scene it!"

Garage sales have a lot of Die Hard customers, we even had a guy show up the night before we started, trying to get the jump on the other people.  He was lurking outside our house like the hitchhiker in "Texas Chainsaw", he was literally insane. I'm known for being too nice to people especially the mentally ill, so I was awkwardly polite. But I also live with a bunch of assholes who treated him like he was trying to hand deliver AIDS, as they ran him off the property.  But he got the last laugh by coming back the next day and buying a sweet leather jacket once worn by John Goodman.